You Watch Over Me.

You watch over me in the darkest valleys.

You watch over me when the night seems long.

You help me to see, the way before me.

You watch over me, You watch over me.

"..and be content with what you have, because God has said, "Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you," And so we say with confidence, "The Lord is my helper, I will not be afraid. What can mere mortals do to me?" -Hebrews 13:5-6

In a matter of a few days my life has drastically changed. Austin got a call about a job back in Georgia on Thursday and is hearing back from them tomorrow. He has been offered a position with the water dept. for the county he lives in and it is something he has been waiting on for a long time, even before he moved here to Indiana to be with me. If he is offered this job tomorrow we will be packing up (AGAIN) and heading down to GA! I know..I just started a salon here in Crawfordsville with the help of my precious family and dear friend Morgan Servies-Smith but I guess this just comes with the territory of getting married. I have to look at the bigger picture for what is best for us, our future, and our future family. We definitely knew we would end up going back to GA, as there are much better job oppportunities for Austin but we just had NO idea it would be this soon. We are even thinking about moving the wedding date up..like 6 months up. We're still trying to figure out why we even thought about waiting a year..its just too long. So with that being said, a LOT falls on tomorrow. I am delighted that Austin will be in a job he loves and has waited for but I am absolutely heartbroken that I will be once again leaving home..this time for good..and before Brennan even got home from California. I have been in constant prayer to have a peace about this if it is God's will but lets face it: someone loses. Someone has to leave their family and friends behind. We knew this going into our relationship and engagement but no one ever knew how HARD it really would be. I just have so many mixed feelings. First, selfishly: what about my job; my salon? Who will I hang out with? Will I have friends? Will I want to come home. But I don't want to leave my family. What if I get there and hate it? Will I feel stuck?...and then the selfless side kicks in: its best for our future. My family can come visit anytime. I will find a job..I will make friends. Austin will have a great job that allows him great pay and great hour, etc. I AM IN SUCH A HARD SPOT! Obviously I know we will go to GA if he gets this job but I am so desperate for a peace about it it is driving me crazy. I would follow Austin anywhere but I just wish it were easier. I am so close to my family and friends and I just can't imagine that in THREE WEEKS I could be living back in GA. There's just so much closure that would need to happen between now and then and thats what scares me I think. But I am just resting in Gods plan. This job didn't just come up randomly and I think if Austin gets it that will be our answer: time to go back. Yikes.

I really am so thankful that I am never out of Gods care and plan though. If you would've asked me one year ago today if I would be engaged, in this predicament, and at this point in my life I would have laughed in your face. But, day by day, I am falling more and more in love with life..God..and my fiance. We might not have picture perfect circumstances..but nothing I've ever done has ever been normal anyways, I'm not sure what I was expecting. :) So here's to yet another adventure brought to my life. I know I will never be given more than I can handle and there really is such peace in that..even if it means packing up my life into boxes in a matter of 2 weeks, putting together a wedding faster than I ever thought, and figuring out life as we go..at least I'm doing it all with my soulmate. Thank you, God, for Austin and for opportunities..no matter how random they may be! I don't always know what's best for me, contrary to what I may think, and somehow, someway, that is a little comforting..for I am only a man. I have a God who knew me in my mothers womb..how can I worry about a move?! It is what it is. Deep breaths, Bailey, it will all work out..it always does...

Changes.

APRIL. April..I have not blogged since April. When did my life get so hectic that I lost my motivation and drive to write. Writing is an outlet for me and I have to make this a priority again. I'm so much happier when I can sort out my daily thoughts and get my feelings out there..so better late than never, right?! I was looking back on my last entry and the thing that stuck out to me most is that I had a boyfriend then. I don't have a boyfriend now..I have a FIANCE!! Yes I'm sure everyone already knows but seriously I'M GETTING MARRIED! In a nutshell, my amazing and wonderful Austin got all moved up here and lives in the little cottage house behind my Grandpa Jim's house and is working at Temple Inland which he's not too sure of but is making great money for our life together soon! He proposed May 23 at Fogo De Chao and I have never been happier in my life. My family and friends LOVE him and he just fits right in. It's been SUCH a blast planning a wedding..my engagement ring is the most beautiful thing I've ever seen..I have my dream dress..and the details are slowly coming together..we have a HUGE wedding party with 10 bridesmaids and 10 groomsmen. How fun right!? We have switched colors and ideas already so much so I'm not exactly sure on details yet but I do know that we are getting married June 16, 2012..and believe me I am already counting down! We don't have a ceremony venue yet but have booked the Crawfordsville Country Club for the reception. All I know is that its going to be amazing and perfect and its all because of the Godly, wonderful, caring, sweet, kind, selfless, hardworking, smart and SOUTHERN man that I've fallen soo in love with. He's truly made all my dreams come true. I am the luckiest woman alive. I also know that as soon as we get married we are moving back to GA. It's not my first decision but I have to support my future HUSBAND with what is best for us and our future and with his jobs and opportunities it seems best to move..and I know that I can always do hair anywhere. I have been praying about it and I have a peace about it..God really is so faithful. I guess I'm just so happy it doesn't matter..I would follow Austin to the ends of this earth and do anything to be with him..and being 4 hours from the beach wont hurt either. ;)

Other news quickly before I pass out because its 2:30am and I'm still up watching trash tv: Brennan graduated Recruit training and is now back in Infantry training in Camp Pendleton, CA and only has about 5 weeks yet before he comes home for awhile we hope!!! He is a reservist right now so has signed on for 6 years but is not active duty so he won't be the very first to go fight but not too far behind..there's a great chance he will be deployed sometime within the next 6 years..sad but were so proud of him and cant wait to love on him and have him home at least for awhile. He has been through more than most people will ever dream and he's truly our hero. <33 Work is going well..still workin at my little salon mom and dad set up for me under Morgan Servies and I am loving it. Not tooo busy yet but slowly building a clientelle and really enjoying what I do. I've even thought about going back to school though to do something with the justice system but I can't decide. I'm just not completely fulfilled but I just think its because I'm not super busy yet. But my clients that I do have are so amazing and wonderful and I really do love what I do. It lets me be creative and doesn't even seem like a job..I am so blessed. My family is wonderful..just trying to enjoy summer together..lots of days by the pool and cookouts..OH and I turned 21 last week and had a blast celebrating! I am so thankful for my family and friends. I am one lucky girl and I owe it all to my Savior. This time last year I was dealing with so many battles and struggling with what was to come and what decisions I was supposed to make but looking back EVERYTHING good and bad happened for a reason and got me to this amazing point in my life and I've never felt so at peace and happy and like where I'm at and who I am with is RIGHT. It's amazing what obedience to Christ and prayer can do, I'm tellin ya. Well I'm off to bed..gonna go to Indy with momma tomorrow for wedding dress fittings, wedding band picking, and shopping! To God alone be the glory!!

Too Long.

I can't believe it's been so long since I've blogged. It's a shame really. I always want to say life gets too busy..but really that's no excuse. Last time I checked in things were about the same as they are now: business is great, Austin's wonderful, and I have the best friends and family around. This past weekend my family and I had the opportunity to go see our friends, The Gangloffs, for Janet's surprise 50th birthday party. It was a huge success and SUCH a blessing to be able to be there. It's so amazing how God keeps us fired up and encouraged for Him when we need it most. Being at the Gangloffs is always such a warm and open environment and it would just be so amazing if the world was like that all the time. Janet is such a beautiful and radiant example of Christ's love and what it's like to be a true and faithful believer and I look up to her so much. Even though she has been through more than anyone ever should in one lifetime, she continues to ooze Jesus and show that He is the center of her world. Happy Birthday! I'm so blessed to have such wonderful people in my life, even if I don't get to see them very often. It's just so good to be around genuine, pure, strong, and faithful Christians. I love you guys! ...........................................................................................................................................................I get to see my boyfriend this weekend, I get to see my boyfriend this weekend!!! I'm flying down to GA on Friday to see Austin and his family before he MOVES here in a few weeks and I couldn't be more excited. It'll be so good to spend time with him and everyone. God has TRULY blessed me with him. I couldn't think of anyone more perfect for me and it is just so exciting to see God's plan unfolding. I know I may be young, but I truly, fully, wholly know what love is now and it's the best feeling in the world. It blows my mind daily how He brought us together being from two completely different states but I know in my heart that it was truly meant to be. Everything is just working out perfectly and I am so ready to start my life with him. He's so wonderful and loves Jesus and respects me more than anyone ever has and I know that he's never, ever gonna leave me. That is such a wonderful feeling and I can't get enough. It's so true that absence makes the heart grow fonder..the time I do get with him is so precious and sweet and I can't wait to see his face on Friday. I never thought I would say all these goofy, mushy things, but I am so in love it's unreal and I thank God everyday for bringing me someone that I will spend the rest of my life with and can honor Him with and be so happy. ..................................................................................................................................................Life is good. God is good. I could NOT be more happy or more excited for all the amazing upcoming plans in my life. It's wonderful to look back at the past few months and see how life has bloomed. I am literally the luckiest girl in the world and I really need to start counting my blessings more often. I am so excited for everything happening, but even more excited about sharing it all with the best people on the planet. I couldn't imagine my life any different and it's only getting better. ................................................................................................................................. "Yet this I call to mind and therefore I have hope: Because of the Lord's great love we are not consumed, for His compassions fail not. They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness. I say to myself, "The Lord is my portion, therefore I will wait for Him." The Lord is good to those whose hope is in Him, to the ones who seek Him." - Lamentations 3:21-25

Blessings.

I'm sitting here curled up in my baggy sweats and glasses, pillowcase fresh out of the dryer, just finished talking to my amazing boyfriend before he goes to bed, watching tivo'd episodes of American Idol with my family. Doesn't get much better than this, folks. I'm just in awe of life's blessings lately..and it's nothing exravagant either. Like I've always heard, it's amazing how love can change your life. I appreciate things so much more and Austin has made me re-evaluate so many things and simply be thankful for the everything God blesses us with. Life could not be better. Work has been going so well, not 100% busy yet since I still need to take state boards, but I've had so many family members and friends come give me their business and it's been awesome. (Thanks guys!) We leave for our Carribean cruise Sunday and I am soo excited. My parents, Aimee, the Rykers, the Surbers, and I are going on a 7 night cruise to Belize, Grand Cayman Islands, and Cozumel. I am so ready for some sunshine and best friend time. I will not miss the United States one bit. Ha. Austin and I could not be better. He came and visited this past weekend and it was a blast. We went to Little Mexico, saw my salon, went to the Beef House, went to church, hung out and watched movies at home and just goofed off and layed around and had amazing talks. He's my best friend and I am so anxious for him to move here. Just about 3.5 more weeks and he'll be here!! We're still looking for apartments for him but I'm pretty sure he has a job lined up. Things are really falling into place. We're both just gonna work for about a year and save money until we can get married sometime next summer. I don't care that I've only known him 7 months, I am 100% sure he's who God has for me. After all, my parents got engaged after 3 months..funny how you follow in their footsteps in certain things. ;) I'm the happiest I've ever been and I owe it ALL to Christ. My parents have been pretty great with everything too, I'm just so thankful for all their love and support. Brennan's been gone 6.5 weeks today at boot camp..halfway done! I couldn't be more proud. It's a daily struggle having him gone and I think I see my momma cry at least twice a day, but the day we go to San Diego and watch him be presented with his Eagle, Globe, and Anchor and deemed a US Marine will be one of the most amazing moments we'll ever experience. I don't know many people, especially in this day and age, who are willing to go serve at 17 years old and enjoy it as much as he does. Truly an American hero and I'm so lucky to call him, "brother."

I guess it just all comes down to this: I serve one AMAZING and FAITHFUL God, I have the perfect job and am supported by so many people, and I have THE BEST friends and family in this entire world. Honestly, what more could you ask for? I am firm and confident in my salvation and relationship with Christ and know that I have people to turn to day or night for anything I would ever need. I have been blessed with way more I deserve but it's so amazing what life has to offer when you start living for God and trusting that everything..will always..be okay. It's so easy to say that we trust God when things are good but even in trials we need to have the same spirit and I'm learning to live that way. We should cling to Christ most and have full faith in His plan even when we can't see "why." To trust Him means to whole-heartedly have faith in a NEW way..a less worried way. Gosh, things are great. I've just been so encouraged lately and I'm so happy with how everything is falling into place. Now I just need my boyfriend here and life will be even better.

For all you reading, I love you. God loves you. I'm praying for you and no matter what you're going through right this second, God is BIGGER. There is always a light at the end of the tunnel. Love life and life will love you back.

Crazy Love.

I couldn't sleep last night so I was kinda rummaging through my room going through things when I found a Target bag from a few weeks ago with the book, Crazy Love by Francis Chan inside. I had always seen this book at Christian bookstores but never really read the back but when it was on sale a few weeks ago I decided to pick it up not even knowing what it was about. So I figured reading always makes me sleepy and little did I know, I was about to open up and read life-changing words. I got through about 70 pages before I just couldn't keep my eyes open anymore but I already can't wait to finish it...and then read it again. The jist of the book is living DIFFERENTLY for Christ. Not just knowing who God is but really having a desire to fear Him and live for Him. To realize that life is 100% more abundant when lived for God, and that we are NOTHING without Him. In the beginning of this book, Francis has you stop and go look up a video on just how BIG God is. (I will post it at the end of this post) It will change your whole outlook and will stop you in your tracks and let you marvel in his totally awesome and creative mind and make you realize just how SMALL you really are. Incredible.

Even though I haven't been struggling with one specific sin lately in my life I have been praying for conviction on even the smallest things in my life: patience with my parents, letting a curse word slip out when I am frustrated, letting myself get overwhelmed for no reason..and not to say that these things don't matter but what I want is to live a clean life. To live right because I want to and not just because it's what I should do. I think we, as Christians, get complacent. We forget the true meaning behind why we try and do the right thing. We go to church because our parents go, because we were raised to believe that Sundays are for church and not because we are hungry for more Jesus..we pray before bed because it's routine or we want something, not because we want a real conversation with God. We do the right things in front of our peers and in public because it makes us look better and seem like good people, not because we know we owe God our lives and to be examples and witnesses. We HAVE to change. We have to WANT Jesus. We have to know that a life lived for God will be, not can be, but WILL be better than anything this world has to offer. We have to whole-heartedly trust that even though it's not always the most popular thing, taking a stand for Jesus WILL change lives and that God promises good for those to seek Him. We will never be able to fully understand God and what He is up to in our lives, but we must not stop searching. Ever.

I have friends lately that have turned to worldly things for comfort and peace and simply to "numb" the life they know..when really they don't even have it bad at all. It breaks my heart for people who have experienced God's goodness and still choose to live that way. NOT saying I am perfect at all or never choose this world, but that is what this book is teaching me, to WANT to change and to trust that God will be sufficient if we do the right thing. If everyone could see just a glipse of God's grace and peace and faithfulness I just know that this world and it's problems would be different. People often ask why God "lets" bad things happen when in reality the only explanation He "owes" us (and really He doesn't owe us anything..) is that He is God, and that is enough if we trust and know that He has a plan. We often think that if we were given the chance to play God, that we, dirty sinning humans, wouldn't dare let bad things happen because it's just not fair. Shame on us. We think we could do better when we sin every single day and yet the BLEMISH-FREE, ALL-KNOWING, and PERFECT God we claim to trust IS doing just that: what is best and we have to know that it is for our good. We wouldn't be true Christians if we didn't believe that. God promises good to those who believe and life is so short so we have to share that with the hopeless. It's what we are called to do.

I often wonder why when people are buddhist or atheist or taoist or wiccan or "coexist" they get a "thumbs-up" for being different and exploring options but yet if someone finds out you're a Christian it's either looked down upon or that you're just like everyone else. THIS IS A PROBLEM. Chrisians are more known for what they don't do: don't drink, don't have sex before marriage, don't go out with their friends, don't have fun, don't like anyone different than themselves, etc., than for what we are doing. We should be known for helping others first, loving unconditionally, NOT JUDGING, doing whatever it takes to show God's love, still being in the places where there are no other Christians to be a witness, and simply sharing the truth but not shoving our beliefs down people's throats. IT IS SO IMPORTANT to change people's views on Christianity..the fate of our religion depends on it. Our generation is so good at being bold and making thing happen and if we could only do this with Christianity, too, I know there would be a revolution.

Something that REALLY bothers me is that Christians are first and foremost known for judging anyone who is different, down to little things. Having tattoos and facial piercings and a gay friend who I hang out with regularly, I personally have felt judged around "church people" and in certain churches and I feel that this is SO wrong because no one got the chance to get my beliefs and that I believe in God. It was overlooked my my outward appearance and that is something that makes me SO sad. I know my parents don't neccessarily like my tattoos and such but as TRUE CHRISTIANS we are called to look at everyone's heart and not be so worried about the outside. One of my favorite bible verses EVER is one that my brother, Brennan, wrote in crayon on a piece of paper in like kindergarten and it reads, "Man looks at the outward, but the LORD looks at the heart." - 1 Samuel 16:7 IT IS SO TRUE..and if we are trying to be LIKE the LORD..which is the whole point of claiming to be a Christian (Being more like Jesus..) then why are we still looking at outward appearance?! It's insane to me. Matthew 7:1 says, "Do not judge, or you too, will be judged." We can't only follow the parts of scripture that we like, we have to follow it all. So I challenge you today to look past pink hair and black clothes and tattoos and people who don't have money and elderly and ANYONE different from you. You don't know their heart or intentions or where they are in life and your kindness might change them. They will notice and difference in you and you can tell them that it's because you have JESUS. What an amazing way to change the world.

I'm begging you today, right now, as youre reading this, to stop and pray for change in your heart. For a desire to LIVE for Christ and the ability to look past people's flaws for everyone, including myself, has them. It will do you so much good. We owe it to our amazing savior. I'm praying for YOU and know that no matter where you are, you have God.

Now watch this video and be in awe of our inspiring and powerful God who is BIGGER than your biggest problem, fear, obstacle, pain, trial, and hurt and knows everything about you. You are not too far gone. I love you. Now be amazed:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LpChZxPfa-c

Happiness.

It's unreal to me some people's immaturity. How someone can do SO much wrong you to and still play the victim and expect you to feel sorry for you. How you can absolutely positively know someone owes you respect and yet they still refuse to give you that. I guess it's just a good life lesson on how fast things can change..and how some people just never will. And I guess all you can do is pray that they learn so that they quit hurting everyone around them..and realize that it's not realistic to live selfishly.

Whew. I just had to get that out. :) Anyway, I've been neglecting this again..I've honestly been so busy with LIFE. I know that's so cliche but it's so true. I've spent countless hours the last week or so catching up with my best friends, cleaning, purging, and unpacking my stuff from GA, and setting up Studio 34..which is almost done! Tomorrow morning we put the finishing touches on it and we'll be ready to rock n roll...about dang time. It's been so good to really get settled in at home. Sleeping in my own bed..not waking up at 5:30 every morning..homecooked meals..and having my friends I've known since birth a phone call away. Although I am away from Austin for about a month or so more..it's been good to be HOME. Speaking of Austin, he's coming to visit in 8 days for the weekend and I can hardly contain my excitement. He's coming to see how things go for when he MOVES here in April!! Yep, he's coming, and I couldn't be happier. Like I said, when you KNOW, you just KNOW. I've never felt so free and content in my life and I have no one to thank but my amazing Savior. Things are still just falling into place and it's amazing to know that I have an amazing future ahead of me. I never would have thought I would be where I am right now, even down to sitting in this chair with my mom and Chloie watching gameshows. Faith is really an amazing thing and I'm so glad I've learned to just sit back and TRUST. Church was so good this past week. Pastor Terry talked about how we 'know the bible is real," and why I don't doubt that it is in any way, it was good to see those examples and scripture. I can't tell you how thrilled I am to be able to sit in church with my family again every Sunday. It's definitely something I need and again, God's timing is just shining through.

We've gotten several letters from Brennan at Marine Corps boot camp in San Diego and he's doing so well. I could not be prouder. He got all 4 wisdom teeth taken out with no anesthesia except 12 novacane (sp?) shots but I guess recovered well and fast. They had their first big drill competition this past Sunday and if their platoon scored 70 or above (whatever that means) they'll get a phone call home. So our fingers are crossed!! We're missing him so much and with all this controversy going on with him being allowed to wear his dress blue military uniform to high school graduation or not (see local news station websites and newspapers..) things have just been crazy and it's been hard not to think about him constantly and miss him. So keep him in your prayers!! 4 weeks down..9 to go!! Almost 1/3 of the way done!! Ooh rah!!

Overall, things are great. I'm gonna have to go to GA to take my state boards I just found out, but other than that, it's going smoothly. Can't wait to be working full time. I LOVE my shop and Morgan couldn't be more amazing to work with. Life's good. God's good. Praying for YOU reading this.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xhdN3rndQwo

Home Sweet Home.

I can't believe I have neglected my blog as long as I have, but what a crazy week and a half it has been! I officially graduated Paul Mitchell the school - Atlanta last Tuesday where I was thrown an amazing suprise going-away party by my awesome friends Lauren and Amy and it was the best day ever!! Such a relief to be done and moving on to the next chapter of my life. Speaking of moving..mom and dad came down to GA last thursday night to spend some time with our dear friends, the Kimmels, and to pack up all my stuff and move me home. Welllll, friday night on our way to eat dinner I was in the car with Austin and it started smoking. We obiously had to pull over and long story short it had to be towed to Conyers to a body shop and fixed and 2 days later we went to pick it up to start our 11 hour journey home only to have it overheat again about 5 minutes after we had payed the shop and left. So the guy came and picked it back up and about 5 hours later it still wasn't done. (We got some awesome shopping in at TJ Maxx and Target though so I wasn't complaining too much..) and ended up going back to the Kimmels for another night and picked it up yesterday morning and finally were able to make the trek back to Crawfordsville. Mom and I followed my dad and it was actually a blast. We listened to all kinds of music and got caught up on the last few weeks and pulled in the driveway about 9:30pm last night. Then Aimee and Drew and Korbin came over and we watched American Idol. Such a good feeling knowing I'm home to stay..but definitely bittersweet.

You're probably all wondering who this Austin character is that I have mentioned a few times in my previous blogs. Maybe not. But either way, you're about to find out. Remember my struggles and heartaches over the past few months? Well God has definitely revealed Himself yet again as to why things work out the way they do and I couldn't be more thankful. I met Austin Halloween weekend when I stayed with my friend Chelci from school. We were both single at the time and I was excited just to see how things went. Well we hit it off great and honestly from then on were inseperable. A few months later I sorta got cold-feet with my future being so unknown since I was about to graduate and wanting to move home (this was all before my salon plans) and so I backed out and went for things and people more comfortable which was the most foolish thing I could've ever done. But I look back now and the say is true: sometimes you don't realize what you've got til it's gone. So somehow over the past month or so, God brought Austin back in my life. Sweet, caring, and forgiving Austin and life COULD NOT be better. He's a wonderful, Christian, hard-working, sweet, sincere, down-home, COUNTRY boy and for the first time in my life, I'm 100% content. He treats me better than I could ever imagine, is so selfless and respectful, and I know that God has us together for a reason. He's still in GA right now working and saving up money but we're planning on having him move to IN as soon as he can and I couldn't be more happy. It's amazing the things God brings your way when you least expect them and when you KNOW, you just KNOW and I'm not afraid for the whole (cyber) world to know!!

Life has just been one HUGE blessing after another and I owe it all to Christ first and my wonderful family second. I could not have and do the things I'm able to without them. I just have had so many amazing oppotunities lately and I'm just so thankful. My good friend Lexi called me the other day and invited me to be apart of Beautiful You..a gathering with high school girls from all over and a speaker and the band, Alanna Story. It has to do with self-image and accepting who you are in Christ and not looking back at your past but remembering that you're beautiful no matter what. Local hairstylists are teaming up to do makeovers on the girls and I think it's going to be a great oppportunity to witness and see how God is working around Crawfordsville and see friends I haven't got to see for awhile and get time to worship. And speaking of doing hair..I'm about to go see my alomst finished salon for the first time today! I am so excited and couldn't be working with a nicer or sweeter girl, Morgan Servies-Smith. I have decided to name my shop "Studio 34" after Psalm 34 which is my favorite book of the bible. I figured it was unique and a good way for people to ask "why 34?" and be able to share my faith in a casual way. I am so excited for all the upcoming events and opportunities and experiences and it it so amazing what happens when Christ replaces worry in your life and you trust Him in everything.

I'll be updating more soon and uploading pictures of the salon. Please spread the word and any questions feel free to contact me : 765.376.5384

God is good, all the time.

Here's a video on Alanna Story, the band that will be at Beautiful You. I have seen them live and they are SO AMAZING:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YMTWzMgNzUw