So here I sit again at 12:54am when I have to be up at 5:40. Why oh why can't my little brain just STOP overanalyzing and just let me rest?! It seemed as though things were looking up for me this week as my time at Paul Mitchell is coming to an end and my move home is highly anticipated..but then all of a sudden life throws me curveballs. Shocker. Without details, I'm moving back to Katies (which I really am happy about, I love you Katie!!) but it was really sudden and without reason..and of course after I bought my tanning/gym membership back where I was living. I also realized how much I will have to get done in these last 6 weeks at school, find the time to move everything back to Katies, start packing up to move home, study for State Boards back in Indiana annnd maintain my sanity. Although this may not sound like a lot..it really is. I feel like all I ever do is drive..over and hour to and from school everyday, back and forth from Dallas to Locust Grove which is about 2 hours..and then everywhere else I need to go. If it seems like I'm complaining..I AM..because this is my blog and I can!! But really it's not so much complaining, but more venting about all the things on my heart right now.
It's not that I doubt that I can get it all done, but it's the worry that consumes me. But Matthew 6:34 says, "Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own." Thus to anticipate future troubles is to doubt God's plan and will for my life. And though troubles may visit daily, so does Christ. And it is by His grace that I will be able to get through this rough patch, learn from these troubles and be strengthened by this journey. That is a blessing in itself. Just by writing this I have been given rejuvenation and peace and am remembering that God knows my every move and has even my next breath in His plan. I just have to face these trials head on and get through them. Although right now it is so hard to see the light at the end of the tunnel I need to take it ONE DAY at a time. Life is precious and I need to savor every moment, difficult or not, for it is shaping and molding me into the person I need to be for my upcoming triumph over school and difficulties I am facing now.
It never ceases to amaze me that when I am at my worst it literally feels like God is shaking me to wake me up and TRUST HIM. Trust that I am exactly where I need to be, I am capable and more motivated than I think, and that I can do this. I can do ALL things through Christ who strengthens me. This post quickly turned from discouraged to encouraged and that alone proves God's sovereignty and how much He cares for me and wants nothing but good things for His children even when we doubt. I'm off to sleep a comforted peace. (Although I still want my bed at home and my momma more than anything!)
"Let the morning bring me word of your unfailing love, for I have put my trust in You. Show me the way I should go, for to you I lift up my soul." - Psalm 118:8
"And we pray this in order that you may live a life worthy of the Lord and may please Him in every way: bearing fruit in every good work, growing in the knowledge of God, being strengthened with all power according to His glorious might so that you may have great ENDURANCE and PATIENCE, and joyfully giving thanks to the Father, who has qualified you to share in the inheritance of the saints in the kingdom of light." - Colossians 1:10-12
No comments:
Post a Comment